Rules of (almost) Engagement

Here’s just a quick little post to share some tips I’m picking up as I’m anticipating the engagement. I seem to be getting crazier by the day.

1. Don’t let paranoia get the best of you. Seriously, it seems like I’m second-guessing everything. Why is the video camera charging (to capture the moment, perhaps?) Even things at work have me doing double-takes, like it’s some conspiracy, although a nice one.

2. Phone calls. I’ve found that as I feel I’m getting closer and closer to the engagement,  my friends magically answer the phone on the first ring. Normally, a lot of times it takes a couple of calls to get a hold of someone, as we’re all busy people – but lately, I’ve been getting great cellular attention. If said person doesn’t answer, I immediately send a text: “CALL ME”. Then, they call, listen intently to everything I’m saying (about my hair cut, vacuum cleaner, you know – exciting stuff,) all while waiting for me to drop the news. You probably shouldn’t do this if you want your friends to continue taking your calls through your actual engagement. I’ll try to restrain myself.

3. Try not to be the crazy girl who shares her thoughts on exactly how it’s going to happen at social gatherings. Especially don’t go into detail on the wedding plans and oh, did I mention I also have an I’m not engaged, but planning everything wedding blog? Sure, it makes for great conversation at the time and everyone gets a good laugh, but you’ll no doubt leave with conversation remorse and feel like the crazy girl.

4. Keep your cool. Sure, it’s Memorial Day weekend, it’d be a great time to get the little gem (and promise to spend my life with G, yada, yada), but I’m known to overanalyze, it probably won’t happen and I’ll be okay with the let-down. Well, ok after a lot of ice cream, but still.

So, these actually turned out to be tips to myself.

Happy Memorial Day!

The couple

How we met:  Since we were from the same area, we had attended some of the same parties in high school, although we never actually met. 

The official meeting happened when I was a sophomore in college and was home for Labor Day weekend. Some friends and I decided at the last minute to swing by a party at an old farm house somewhere outside of New Vienna, IA. Side note: I heard a rumor that the house burned down. Sad! 

G and I started talking at the party, exchanged numbers and went on our first date (to the movie Radio) the very next night. 

We lived two and a half hours apart, so for the next several months we saw each other when we could. G would come see me in Ames, eat all of my food, talk entirely too much about all things deer and head back home, picking up speeding tickets along the way. What can I say? He’s a charmer! 

Several months later, G took a job and moved to Ankeny, a 20 minute drive, which made things much easier! 

Over the years, G has taught me how to shoot a bow and arrow, properly shoot a deer, the basics of scoring a deer…do you see a trend here? He loves deer like I love Von Maur. 

We have been blessed with some wild adventures throughout our relationship. To top it off, this year we bought a house (thank you, $8,000 tax credit!), both have great family and friends and  jobs we love. What more could we ask for?  Okay, well… maybe one little sparkly detail.  

Below is a photo of us in Puerto Rico last April.

And finally, no post about “us” would be complete without a cameo appearance of Beau, our best big friend! He will be sporting a tie for the big day! 

Anticipation diaries: continued

The ring has been purchased!! The ring has been purchased!!

I know this fine little detail, because to my advantage, someone can NOT keep a secret – seriously, I wasn’t even pressing him hard for information!  We picked the ring out, (I picked out, he sat nervously as I gawked,) what seems like ions ago at Iowa Diamond. I would highly recommend them!

Terri, our saleswomen shared a statistic with us, something like 90% of couples that look at rings purchase within two months. Well, we shattered that stat! Iowa Diamond was awesome to work with, they kept a record of exactly what I liked, so thankfully all G had to do was call!

I’ve scoured the internet trying to find a picture of my ring, but can’t. So, I’ll just have to wait until the big question – or until I can find a friend who can crack the code to his safe!

Now I wait (some more), search my closet for the perfect proposal outfit and practice my dramatic, surprised response.

A tented affair: A challenge

I’m always up for a challenge! I’m set on having a tented wedding. They can  be simply gorgeous, and I’m learning, they can also be simple headaches. Yes, even before the ring, the details of a tented wedding have me popping asprin and have spurred the creation of a 3-page to-do list. The more research I do on tented weddings, the farther up “wedding planner” moves on my list of  ”must haves”. 

Advantages of a tented wedding: 

• A clean slate: We could truly create a wedding unique to us as a couple
• Opportunity to have a unique location
• Could eliminate the need for a wedding and reception location
• Not limited to using a facility’s food or beverage service
• No facility rules to follow (set-up/clean-up times, allowable decorations, time limitations)
• SO PRETTY!

Disadvantages (Boo!) 

• Cost – Since we would be building it from the ground up, we would have to rent everything from the floor and chairs to the restrooms (I now know more than I could have ever wanted to know about portable restrooms – who knew there were such involved calculations?!)
• Location in Delaware County, IA: I thought I had the venue all figured out, but this could be one of the biggest challenges. We are on the hunt for a tent location, preferably not a corn/bean field.
• Back-up plan. I tend to have fairly bad luck, so golf ball sized hail on my wedding day is definitely a scenario we will plan for. This is yet another expense and detail that could potentially throw a wild card into our invitation if it’s at a different site than our tent location.

I’m inspired by the strokes of tent genius below by Table 6 Productions (LOVE THEM!) as featured on The Southern Wedding Blog. 

 

Simply breath-taking

  

I love the lighted path to the tent

  

I really like the idea of having multiple tents, especially if the venue doesn't have a building

  

I'd also like to incorporate water somehow - it's a great effect with the lighting

  

Now this is a "grand entrance!"

  

Check out the checkered floor!

The anticipation diaries – 2 weeks!

Ah, of the mistakes men make, this HAS to be a classic: the specific time-frame.  

Now if only I can get a ball to drop…

Poor G, little does he know, I have selective perfect memory recall with sentences beginning with “We’ll be engaged in…” Please note, he’s pretty confident I’ll say yes. He doesn’t word it as ”I will propose in x.” Confidence. I like it.  

That’s right, G nonchalantly mentioned that we would be engaged within TWO WEEKS!

Me. Engaged. 2 Weeks.

Have you noticed he’s horrible at keeping secrets? Sure, he’s mentioned broad, long-term, she’ll forget by then plans before, and he was right, they have very clearly come and gone. Not this time! See? I’m even putting it out there, complete with a crazy photo of a countdown clock for my whole entire blog following to see. (Ok, ok, well at least my mom – I think.)

 

There’s unquestionably numerous problems with the discovery of this time-frame:   

A: It’s now a thing. I, Ashley, the crazy girlfriend has made this into a big “thing” – mostly by posting it here on this just as crazy blog. But hey, it’s all in fun. I might as well share this oh so exciting time.

B: Oblivious. G, in typical male fashion has no idea that I’ll be planning my every move for the next 2 weeks in anticipation. (AKA, will be wearing lip gloss 24/7 ) you know just in a case G jumps out of the bushes with flowers and ring in hand and a photographer with an over-sized camera catches the moment.) Not that I’ve ever thought of this as one of the 1,000 proposal scenarios.  

C: The extension. Just tonight I very coyly brought up that he mentioned 2 WEEKS and he pulled off a  perfect amnesia recovery scene right in front of my eyes. It was remarkable. A miracle. Funny, though as he recalls he “must have said four or five weeks.”  

D: Disappointment set-up. Sure, if it doesn’t happen I’ll be a little disappointed but it’s not like it hasn’t been SEVEN years or anything. What’s another little bit?  

E: Spoiler-Alert. If it turns out it does happen within two weeks, one could argue me knowing the exact time-frame spoils a bit of the surprise factor. I take some of the blame for this in my persistent questioning and knowing his weaknessess in secret-keeping.

Sometimes I do wonder why this is such a huge deal. Why is it that the woman is always waiting for, (er, blogging about, whatever) the man to ask her to  marry him? I blame Disney. Because it’s someone to blame, not a fan of Rapunzel and also because I think it’s one tradition worth keeping. Every girl wants the one she loves to ask for her hand in marriage. For forever. And so I wait.   

Oh – and because I really really really love the ring we have picked out. I’m sure he’d be heart-broken if I bought it before he had a chance, so I’ll just let him. Pictures to come in 2 WEEKS or less.   

Pre-wedding planning (before the bling)

In an effort to have more time to stare at my left finger when the little sparkler arrives, I’ve been working to get a head start on some of the big decisions. (Obviously, hence my big fun secret).

Here’s where things stand – I’ve made some progress!

Location.  As my friends and anyone who has been lucky enough to be around when this subject has come up knows, this has been a heated LONG-term debate between G and I. I’ll post more about us, including how we met soon, but for now a short version. We both grew up in the same area (same county in Iowa is basically a stones throw away). This makes it incredibly convenient when going home for the holidays or long-weekends, and it’s just all-around great to have everyone in one place.

This being said, you would think the obvious choice would be to have the wedding in our home county. However, I like to be difficult and also prove a valid point. We’ve both lived in Central Iowa (approximately three hours away) for about seven years now. I met all of my close friends in college, organizations, work, etc. and sadly, don’t keep in touch with but a handful of my hometown friends. Not to mention, the Des Moines area boosts roughly 1,000 times the amount of venue and vendor options.

G, on the other hand, keeps in touch with a majority of his hometown friends, has a large family in the area and has his heart set on getting married back home – mine was on a Des Moines wedding.

Alas, you can see the problem. Only after very recently attending my brother’s wedding in our hometown I’ve changed my position. I saw all of the love and support of so many people who played such big roles in my brother’s life, but probably would not have commuted to an out-of-town wedding for a variety of reasons. I selfishly didn’t even consider my relatives that farm and literally have a hard time leaving for even a half a day.

I’ve come to the other side and have hesitantly agreed on a hometown wedding, with my fingers crossed tightly that all of the Central Iowans that are so important to me will make the three hour commute on my wedding day, or my side might just be a little bare.

Venue. I’m surprisingly totally excited about our venue choices. We don’t have one officially picked yet, but let’s just say we even visited one possibility when we were back last weekend. (HIS idea/planning!)

Date. I have a DATE SET! I’ll disclose this after the engagement and after the venue contract has been signed. I know, the suspense!

Guest List. I’ve started a very preliminary guest list. It needs to go through about six sets of additions, but it’s started. And it’s in my customized excel format for easy track ability.

Wedding party. I have my maids and attendants picked, but the big reveal won’t come until they’ve all accepted said proposition. (YAY!) This makes me smile just thinking about this group of girls I’m so lucky to have as a part of my life!

Although we’ve discussed it many times, the final groomsmen/usher list has not yet been finalized, other than his obvious best man, his only brother, who I too have grown to love as my own.  Apparently he hasn’t put the thought into the rest of his list that I did my list yet. Crazy, I know!

Other Current Endeavors:
Budget. No budget set yet, but we know we need to discuss this soon. Remind me to have lots of wine for this conversation. Let’s just say we have different ideas about anything finances!  

Researching planners. Yes, I’m 90% sure I’m going to hire a planner so I can enjoy the process,  focus on meeting other goals in my life and not entirely stress myself out as the big day gets closer.

Researching photographers. I have one in mind that I’d love to use, but need to check into availability, pricing, etc.  I’d like to have our e-session done shortly after the engagement, so I’ll need to make the final decision soon!

Pondering themes and colors.

Adding to Ashley’s great ideas list.

AND…

Waiting ever so patiently. I’m getting more and more paranoid as there are more and more hints that the question will be popped soon. One of my main concerns is what I’ll be wearing. Kind of. Oh, come on! Every girl thinks about what her “engagement outfit” will be. This has prompted my responses to anything about an engagement to now be geared towards if it will be day or night, formal or informal, etc. Although the thought of buying a new outfit for everyday until it happens has indeed crossed my mind, I would rather cross my fingers and be able to afford a wedding at all.

Best of…Engagement Photos!

I’ve had the wall that our sure to be awesome, favorite engagement photo will hang on picked out since the first walk-through before we even owned our house. Crazy? I like to call it planning ahead. Yet another reason we make such a great match, my significant other made sure we were covered with practical issues such as a leaky basement or faulty wiring and I confirmed we had a great slate to work with and plenty of storage space for the crazy things I’ll surely buy.  I mean come on, you’d hate to buy a house with no prime spots to hang fabulous shots! 

One of the many things I’m drawn to while stalking various blogs and sites is unique engagement photos, and boy, I’ve found some dandys. Today, I give you some dandys. 

I HEART this white and pink E-session featured on the Weddings and the City blog. A must-visit blog for inspiration overload! Awesome stuff. The shoot is by Kristin Vining. 

Timber meets pink!

Seriously, look at this! It only gets better!

 Table 4 Weddings is simply bursting with creative engagement sessions. My personal favorite is the field of balloons shoot below, including custom Save the Dates.
 

 

Just so you know what the challenge of the difference of opinions I’ll be working with, I thought it would be fun to show a “his and hers” dream engagement sessions.  Below is what HE would swoon over. After all, we would be saying “I do” from tree stands if he had his way. (Thanks Outdoor channel for planting this idea in his head). 

I stumbled across the talented Heather Kessler Photography with tons of awesome stuff, but the camo engagement session totally caught my eye.  Visit Heather Kessler photography’s web site for the full session and more! This would be without a doubt HIS dream shoot:            

 

I do admit, this is quite cute, we even have matching bows and outfits as well!

I hope they're wearing Scent-Lok!

End of a great session in the woods

Brother goes to the chapel…sister’s eye sparkles

My big brother, and only sibling got married Saturday!!! This means, I spent all weekend soaking in the wedding bliss and everything that goes with it, from fabulous tea lights to flowers and cake. Let’s just say being around the details (and cheesecake) gave me a just a little wedding high:)

This wedding season might be a rough one, they really should have a pill for the wannabe bridezilla guests out there, trying to document every little detail. 

I still can’t even believe it. Yes, my brother’s nearly 30,  but it seems as if it was only yesterday I was annoying him any way possible. I take great pride in  having had the whole “little sister” role down to a “t”. Don’t get me wrong, I still annoy him…only from a distance and instead of jumping on his bed I’m calling him giving him my translations (horrible reenactions) of  the latest noises my car is making. 

All kidding aside, I couldn’t ask for a better big brother. Ask anyone, you simply can’t make anger him, believe me, no matter how hard you try! He’d do anything for anyone, and now he has an equally great wife! (And I have that sister I always hoped and prayed for!!) 

Now, to the wedding fun! It was a beautiful Iowa wedding – just a bit chilly for May! Jessie, the bride picked the gorgeous light blue as her primary color and it was simply stunning.

The whole wedding was so stunning, that in fact, much to the dismay of my significant other, I spent the whole three-hour car ride home creating a line item wedding budget of my own – out-loud. I know, I know I’m working on the less-annoying thing but all of the “When’s your big day” questions from family & friends had me all riled up. 

Jessie, welcome to the family, I’m so excited to have a sister-in-law to share cocktails with at family events,  discuss wedding tips and chat over some home-grown Delaware County pork:) Your day was beautiful! 

Wedding Eye Candy!!  

The gel they had for the vases was the coolest thing ever. You just add water...instant gel! It was addicting to play with:)

The centerpieces for the head table for family featured floral arrangements and tea lights. They were beautiful! Did I mention there were HUNDREDS of candles? SO pretty. No fires. Good.

I love love the flower in water with a floating candle on top

The bride to be and crew fancied up these individual boxes of custom m&ms as the favors. Almost every box was a little different, so cute!

They had me at chocolate favors, but they also had these awesome custom cards made. Finally, a favor I'll use!

I swear there had to have been 50 of these. All made with love, all a wee bit different.

Don't you just LOVE the dresses? What a dashing wedding party!

I think this is such a cute idea for a shot!

I often dread the thought of kids for long periods of time, but these kids had me laughing all weekend. They were so well-behaved and SO Stinkin' cute and they did a great job.

I just couldn't resist - we snapped this great pic. at the reception. We had a blast!!

FIRST POST!! So…what exactly is my “Big Fun Secret”?

Greetings! I’m thrilled to be starting this blog to share my fabulous (to me, anyway)  wedding ideas as well as to interact with other brides and crazy, questionably lunatic planners like myself:) 

This brings me to THE question: What the heck is the Big Fun Secret? Frankly, I’m not engaged, my boyfriend (ahem, of SEVEN years) has no idea I’ve started a “wedding planning blog” (I’m sparing myself from the world’s biggest eye roll).  In my mind, the precious little diamond is coming very soon, and we’re well on our way to having the cutest darn lil’ wedding ever — really!

Perhaps this forum will help ease the stigma of being that un-engaged girl with a fat stack of bridal magazines and a desktop full of her very own “inspiration boards”.  HA! Doubt it! It will however, be 100% fun. There will also be the occasional, or not so occasional off-topic, yet hopefully entertaining posts about my exciting Iowan life!

More to come!

See? Look how ravishing we look with a white glow!